Hey That Hurts

In this article about My Chemical Romance, the writer slaps down Jersey City:

To fully appreciate glam/goth pop-punk chart-toppers My Chemical Romance, it helps to understand where the band's leader grew up. Belleville, N.J., is a run-down blue-collar suburb sandwiched between Newark, which still hasn't recovered from the riots of 1968, and Jersey City, one of the ugliest and most corrupt burgs in America.

He goes on to talk about how ugly the Pulaski Skyway is, and the smoldering chemical plants underneath. A cinematic urbanscape, of the ugliest sort, and an inspiration to My Chemical Romance.

Yup, that's my drive to work. Hopefully it will inspire me as it has MCR. And I'll take those album sales, comforting them all the way to the bank.

Right On with the Right On

New Jersey allowed civil unions, and the first couples are being 'unioned.'

We can't call it 'marriage,' because to do so would defile the word. And the 60% of straight marriages that end in divorce don't defile the word, no, it's the GAY people using the word that defiles it?

These 'unions' should be weddings, but I'm still happy for them, and for New Jersey.

This Blog Stll Likes Taco Hell

But I will admit - it keeps getting harder.

Can I ever go back???

WOOPS!

Now this has to be the most embarrassing moments I can think of!

Imagine you're in the middle of choking the chicken with a porn on loud, in the middle of your apartment, thinking you are all good, and this guy busts in, sword in hand, ready to save the dying woman he heard in your apartment.

Cue awkward moment.

At the Forefront of Important News

CNN, bringing you three-toed sloths (Anderson Cooper) and Britney Spears going bald.

Britney just needed to get the lice out of her hair after a bad threesome with some hippies. At least she looks better now!

But I NEED More Than One a Month!

It does not seem unreasonable to me to make it illegal for people to buy more than one gun a month.

So, Kudos to Jersey City for being the first to do so.

I can't imagine what the gun lobby would say: But, in order to hunt rabbits effectively, I need to be able to buy more than one uzi a month.

Or: What if my one gun gets broken while defending my house, and then the one I buy to replace it breaks, too? What then? I'll be naked without my gun!

War on Drugs is Stupid

And Lou Dobbs agrees with me?!!!

Interesting quote:

How can anyone rationalize the fact that the United States, with only 4 percent of the world's population, consumes two-thirds of the world's illegal drugs?

I think probably because we have the most free time and the most free money to spend, and as capitalists, we should spend that money goddamit.

Just a Funny Little Thing

The Perfect Front Man

Wow, This Blog Admits It Once Thought Britney Spears Was Attractive

But how embarassing is that now? It's like admitting you liked Milli Vanilli or something.

I mean, look at her? Wow, how the white trash has risen and then fallen again.

Even the reports that she enjoys lesbian orgies does nothing for me. In fact, it disgusts me. Look at her!!!

Please, Please Don't Make a Big Deal Out of This, America

If people go all ape-shit over this, it would just prove for the millionth time what a bunch of idiotic prudes we can be.

Was Prince's half-time show ridden with phallic imagery????

OF-FUCKING-COURSE. Idiots.

Best quote this article:

Was Prince's pose phallic?

"The short answer is, of course it is," says Rolling Stone magazine contributing editor Gavin Edwards, who points out that on Prince's "Purple Rain" tour in the mid `80s, he performed with a guitar that would ejaculate, squirting water out of its end during the climax of "Let's Go Crazy."

Now THAT would have been something! Imagine blowing half of America's mind with an ejaculating guitar. Sweet.

What If Everyone Stole Your 15 Minutes of Fame

And it wasn't that good to begin with.

And then you fought the rest of your life to get credit for that stupid thing that was supposed to be your 15 minutes of fame?

Then you'd be this guy.

Man, I hate that dance.
(But I've done it before, I'll admit it, usually after copious amounts of liquor.)

Why Doesn't Jersey City Have More Money For Schools?

Because they pay dead people lots of money.

And pay $900,000 for $55,000 copiers. They say it's incompetence but I think it's the MAFIA.

This Blog Would Like to 'Brite'n Your Weekend

Yes, this is the rainbow brite sign that caused the bomb scare in Boston. Apparently, people thought they were improvised electronic devices intended to blow up lots of people.

Now they are for sale on Ebay for big bucks.

Yes Ocifer

I was drinking with YOU!

Another of Jersey City's finest, having too much fun.